The preamble:
Mr #44 and I have been texting on and off for what seems like forever, but in truth I think it was around Christmas when he sent his first fateful message. His dating profile was minimalist, but he looked like a very svelte, elegant and handsome Indian fellow from his profile (like he was modelling for an catalogue company - lots of choice knitwear) and he sounded pretty keen, so we exchanged numbers. But 4 attempts to meet later his texting was getting a little irritating, and I think he may now hold the record for the most uses of the word 'babe' in the course of our messaging history, which regular 52 First Dates readers will acknowledge is a real pet peeve mine. But we'd been messaging so long, and he was trying to spark up text chats during work on such a regular basis, I decided we really should meet once and for all lest we ended up texting until Hell froze over. So finally, after months or sporadic and partially irksome messaging, we arranged the date. He chose the venue, and it was in a brand new pub...right in the middle of Kings Cross station. Hmm...
The man:
Age: 38
Profession: IT developer
Mr #44 and I have been texting on and off for what seems like forever, but in truth I think it was around Christmas when he sent his first fateful message. His dating profile was minimalist, but he looked like a very svelte, elegant and handsome Indian fellow from his profile (like he was modelling for an catalogue company - lots of choice knitwear) and he sounded pretty keen, so we exchanged numbers. But 4 attempts to meet later his texting was getting a little irritating, and I think he may now hold the record for the most uses of the word 'babe' in the course of our messaging history, which regular 52 First Dates readers will acknowledge is a real pet peeve mine. But we'd been messaging so long, and he was trying to spark up text chats during work on such a regular basis, I decided we really should meet once and for all lest we ended up texting until Hell froze over. So finally, after months or sporadic and partially irksome messaging, we arranged the date. He chose the venue, and it was in a brand new pub...right in the middle of Kings Cross station. Hmm...
The man:
Age: 38
Profession: IT developer
That picture is amazing.. "It's pretty much the best drawing I've ever done... the shading on the upper lip took like 3 hours..."
ReplyDeleteHe had me at heart throbe!! hehehe xxx
ReplyDeleteI can well imagine the expression you had on your face as he was drawing you was actually that!
ReplyDeleteI love reading your blog and have nothing but admiration for your pluck, tenacity and humour but I have to say that reading 52 dates has confirmed everything I feared about online dating - nice normal guys just dont do it. I am sure there are exceptions but after 40 dates you seem to have uncovered a freakshow worthy of Victorian England. The odds of unearthing an exception are clearly against us. I'm deleting my GSM profile and reverting to getting drunk in bars. G'luck with your last few weeks of freakfinding. I hope you find an exception. If anyone deserves to it's you!
ReplyDeleteI became a bit obsessed with your blog and check weekly for the latest post but I think you've gone a bit off course...doesn't sound like you're going on dates to try and meet someone you might actually like anymore, you're just crossing off numbers and going out with anyone in order to do a write up. Don't get me wrong, I know how hard it is to meet good people online and I guess after nearly a year you've exhausted a lot of good possibilities (whilst I'm sure new people sign up regularly when I tried my hand at online dating I found after 6 months the same characters cropping up over and over), but is there really any point in some of these dates? I knew from the first paragraph this one wasn't going to be any good and frankly that's a bit boring.
ReplyDeleteI really I'm just criticising here without being constructive but it would be great if you went out with people you have some hope of eventually liking.
(And I'm aware of your defence that you're intentionally going against first instinct as you may be pleasantly suprised but sometimes you definitely just no it's not going to work and at moment you seem to be ignoring that voice).
Hi Anonymous. Thanks for your comment and for sticking with the blog. I totally agree, some of these characters are doomed to failure pretty early on, but right at the start I pledged to go on a date a week for a year regardless, and that's exactly what I'm doing. Do you not think that if I was inundated with offers from men I genuinely liked I would have got this far? It doesn't happen. When I've made the effort to message people whose profiles I've selected that would be to my taste, I never get replies, so this is the best of the rest, which admittedly sounds liek a rather sad indictment on my behalf. Men like #39 don't come along very often, more's the pity, but if I don't carry on playing the numbers game, I definitely won't find him. But like it or not, sometimes I just need to go on a date. CTS x
ReplyDeleteHi Anonymous. As a fellow 52 First Dates obsessee I couldn't disagree with you more - I think that these 'characters' make much more interesting reads than just 'nice guys'. And I would love more than anything for CTS to find the man that will break the blog, but please can you make sure it's number #52 as I don't want to be cheated out of 8 more dates. Thank you please.
ReplyDeleteAimee x
Oh of course they make interesting reading - totally agree with that! I just meant that any vain hope I might have had that there just might be someone online have been well and truly dashed! They're clearly all bonkers or at least about 42 in 44 are and who has time to play those odds?! Anonymous #1
ReplyDeleteX
Hi Anonymous #1. Clearly I have that time on my hands ;-)
ReplyDeletePerhaps I'm making the online scene look a bit grimmer than it is. I know a few people who have met their current long term partners from it so I do have the faith. Perhaps I'm just an unlucky combination of discerning taste and niche market...
CTS x
The guys who don't reply to your messages are clearly missing something. I know the feeling. You are definitely funny, interesting and write really well. Like the others, I can't wait for your next posts. I'm hooked! Unlike you, I can't be bothered to meet the ones that look/sound uninteresting or weird from the beginning. I'm starting to think (like I used to) that the best place to meet someone is work/work events. People see you in a way they won't see you in a date. You know, you definitely are a woman with opionions, many men are scared of that and want a little lamb who will nod to every word they say. There are lots of machos who don't even know there are so. Bonne chance très chère. We should go for coffee and share stories.
ReplyDeleteHi SophieLondon. Thanks very much for your comments. The one really wonderful think I'm taking from this process is that in putting all this online dating business out there in the open, I'm discovering that I'm really not alone in this trying-not-to-be-alone debacle, and that's an ace feeling. It's much bigger than trying to find a boyfriend now, although don't get me wrong, I'l love to find a half-respectable Plus One for forthcoming social engagements. My email address is at the bottom of the page if you want to drop me a line. CTS x
ReplyDeleteYou are totally not alone! This blog and its comments have made me feel like so much less of a loser but not having coupled up yet!
ReplyDeleteI think that old thing about it being harder in London is true but havent the faintest idea why.
X anonymous #1
It's getting on for midnight and I still can't stop reading! By the way, I live in Romford, which is actually in Greater London - London stole it from Essex in 1965! Really just wanted to say that your experiences with Internet dating sound so much like mine! I'm so glad I'm not alone! I rarely get a reply if I message a guy first, and if they do message back, it's more out of politeness as nothing ever comes of it! Must read the last lot of dates before I go to sleep!
ReplyDeleteRomford is the Capital of east London.
DeleteI wonder why I just got an email with this post from 7 years ago. I do miss all the updates!
ReplyDelete